Protect Yo’self

I’ve been gone for a minute now I’m back…in shambles. Because what is actually happening around the country?!

I usually take the earlier part of the winter season to reset and I had every intention to come back with new ideas—especially for the tea room. But lawd…Y’all ok out there?

Let’s start with some tea (the herb kind) then some tea (for your wellness).

Our ally this time is going to be Thyme. Here’s a brief snapshot of this wonderful household herb that’s close to my heart:

• Thymus vulgaris

• Lamiaceae family

• Feminine, Cold, Water, Air, ruled by Venus

• Pungent, slightly bitter & warm

• Anti-microbial, antitussive, expectorant, antibacterial, gastrointestinal issues, respiratory infections, soothing for nerves, labor inducing

• Safe for culinary use; medicinally—caution for those who have gastritis, congestive heart failure, those who are pregnant. Caution if allergic to anything in the mint family

• Spiritually: Protection, purification, courage, healing, harmony

2-3 sprigs to 1 cup of hot water for a traditional infusion.

Now that we have our tea, some things to keep in mind as you doom scroll as a way to remind yourself of some of the power you have in these trying times. Sharing with you because I know I need it too.

1. Combating Information Fatigue

There is a difference between being informed and being consumed. Social media, as powerful as it is, is not meant to be an endless cycle of suffering that you scroll through until your spirit is numb. We get lost in hashtags, find ourselves down several rabbit holes and next thing you know it, you’re on the other side of the internet (it happened to me a few times this week alone). Be intentional about your intake. Set time limits. Unfollow accounts that thrive on doom. Get your news from sources that prioritize accuracy over panic. Trust that you don’t need to know everything in real time to be an engaged, compassionate person.

Most importantly, give yourself permission to step away. If you are drained, you are not absorbing information in a way that allows you to act meaningfully anyway. Read, reflect, rest. The fight will still be there when you return, and you’ll be stronger for it.

2. Navigating the Guilt of "Not Doing Enough"

Let’s be real—social media can make you feel like you’re never doing enough. There’s always another business to boycott, another crisis unfolding, another way you could be contributing. That urgency can be motivating, but it can also be paralyzing. And when we’re paralyzed, there’s no way that we are giving our best self for the cause.

Here’s the truth: you are doing enough. Your activism does not have to be loud or constant to be valid. Some people are on the front lines; others are working behind the scenes. Some educate, some donate, some provide care to those who need it. Some people simply survive—and in times of oppression, survival itself is resistance. Your rest and recovery…is your resistance.

Honor the ways you contribute, no matter how small they seem. Movements are sustained by the collective, not by one person burning themselves out.

3. The Power of Community Care

Speaking of the collective, individual resilience is important, but we were never meant to do this work alone. Community care—mutual aid, sharing resources, checking in on each other—is just as necessary as any protest or policy change. It’s leaning on each other to learn and plan that gives us the strongest foundation. Check to see the on the grounds work that is happening in your neighborhoods. The revolution will not be televised, nor will it be tweeted or have a trending track on it for a 30 sec video. You want to do something? Team up with those who are already doing the work. Can’t find them? Start something locally off the screen. Real g’s move in silence. Never forget.

Make space for joy in resistance. Laugh, connect, celebrate small victories. Hold each other up when the weight of the world feels unbearable. Social media has the power to isolate, but it also has the power to connect us in ways that make healing and collective action possible. Choose connection. Choose rest. Choose to protect yourself so you can keep showing up—not just for the fight, but for the world we are trying to build.

You are needed. You are enough. And you are not alone.

Take care of yourself out there. Until next time…

Mirror, Mirror….

Mirror, Mirror, on the wall…

Back for the new year and my question for you is: Have you looked in the mirror lately?

Odd question, I’m sure. But I mean….did you really look at it? Well let me tell you this, after you read this post, you may not look at it the same way again! 

During my herbalism journey, I’ve learned many ways to assess holistic wellbeing and, though it’s hard to choose just one, Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) is pretty up there (to be fair, my “favorite” shifts depending on what I’m doing). 

Though there are many ways for me to assess within the TCM model, one of the quickest ways to see what’s happening within the body is simply by looking at your face. Our skin is one of our largest organs and honeyyyy….it tells all. There’s a saying that goes “As above so below, as within so without” and that last piece speaks to this so much. As in, what’s happening within will surely be shown on our surface.

For many, this isn’t new. Especially for my sisters: when your monthly cycle comes up—where do you see the most pimples?....exactly. To see what this looks like, take a look at the Face Mapping image below:

Every meridian on your face correlates to another organ of your body. Since it is a large elimination channel, anything that isn’t acting up to par will come up as a pimple…dryness…etc.* As I Learned more, I paid close attention to the part of my body that needs the most support. Every pimple that came up, every time my lips were chapped, all of it. Everything is so interconnected, how can I ignore it now? 

What is one thing that you can do now that *you* know? It starts first with nourishing your body. What have been some of the things stressing you out recently (or over time)? Spiritually speaking, our skin represents our emotions, particularly when we try to keep them in. Life is hard and even when we try to keep it in, it’s going to tell on us one way or the other. So because of this, nourishment and softness are key. We don’t have to be so thick skinned…thin skinned is more than enough. 

Another thing, of course, is checking in with your neighborhood herbalist to see what *else* could be happening. (Feel free to slide in my DMs/Fill out an inquiry form and we can set something up!)

But yeah, fam….Have you looked in the mirror lately? Tell me what you found! 

*This can be said for any part of your skin such as on your legs or your arms but today, we’re focusing on the face

The Bag Lady In All Of Us

…..Alexa, play Erykah Badu’s “Bag Lady”...

Now, I recognize that the mere notion of a Bag Lady doesn’t bring about the best picture. As Ms. Erykah vividly described throughout the song, you get this visual of a woman just being weighed down by the everyday life. From the relationships, to the friendships to just trying to pay the bills. It can feel heavy, daunting. Unattractive, even. To the point where we use different things to mask it with everything from material things to people pleasing. 

But isn’t that true of all of us? Whether it’s a paper bag or a Telfar, we are all essentially baggage handlers, carrying our own baggage. The question becomes: Why do we try so hard to hide it? Who told us we had to? Why do we run from it? And what happens when we just…don’t?

And thus, the creation of The Bag Lady’s Tea Room. The work I do through my brand of Melanated Masks has always been focused on mental wellness for us all. But the reality is, it continues to be a work from my heart as someone who also goes through her own personal struggles through life, love and community. As I continued to grow the brand and experiment in this new age of social media, I tried my hardest to blend into the changed landscape of reels and vids as I scrolled through my timeline of mental health clinicians all doing…well…the same thing. These short tidbits and manageable bite sized pieces of information just to fit on the For You Page. But it didn’t feel full. It didn’t feel like me.

In a strange turn of events, life imitated practice as I searched for what *did* make me feel full and that continues to ground me in my healing path. The only place that held the answers wasn’t in the present but actually a little more than 10 years in the past. The version of me that loved to write to express my life as colorful as can be, before adulthood started kicking up. It led me to dig up my very first blog as I reminisced on the brink of a new decade in my life. It was messy, slightly hilarious (if I do say so myself) but also brought insight to the reality that is coming of age: life, love, career, friends, and family. So, on this search of wanting to do me the best way that I can, I returned back to my first love while I journeyed back to myself in order to best connect to those like me.

To the people who are just trying to get it right.

To the go getters who are navigating on auto pilot

To the ones that are “too much”

To the ones who grieve their former selves, relationships, people, places and things that you have outgrown (or that outgrew you)

I could go on. But the reality is that we are all Bag Ladies (or Bag People). Regardless of degrees, age or even our level in our healing journey. I know your back is tired, fam. Mine is too. So this space is the monthly reprieve to not only drop the bag but ruffle through it a bit. Maybe even organize some things (like receipts you’re holding from 2003. You know you don’t need that no’mo…). This is a space to drop lessons, explore the stories that go with them and the different herbal/therapeutic tools to guide use through it all. Bedazzle your bag, grab a sip of your favorite herbal blend and let’s get to it!

Questions that need answers (QTNA):

What is something from your youth that made you feel alive? Why did you stop?